


Smells of a Floral Car Wash with a side of Fries

by Eden_Lok



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dave Just Wash The Car, F/F, F/M, Lovely lesbians, M/M, Multi, work shenanigans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-24
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-01-25 20:43:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18582244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eden_Lok/pseuds/Eden_Lok
Summary: A Homestuck working AU set around a mixture of jobs worked by our dear fellow Alpha, Beta, and Troll kids.  The set piece is set around a Floral Arts and Craft Store, a Car Wash, and a Sonic like restaurant all set near a beach maybe, still hashin out the deats ya know!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I really love Homestuck and legit my first time writing fanfic of any variety, so please don't be too harsh if this doesn't read well. I'm open to any suggestions on how to improve my work, so yeah!
> 
> I've had this idea floating in my head a bit when I went to a car wash with my dad a while back, and I thought why not pair this up with a couple of other work places and make a fanfic out of this idea.  
> The set piece set around Floral Arts and Craft Store, a Car Wash, and a Sonic like restaurant all set near a beach maybe, still hashin out the deats ya know! Anyways please enjoy reading this, and if I mess up anything or offend anyone I deeply apologize and will try to be more aware of how I write about certain subjects! Thank you!!!

Chapter 1

 

“Kanaya, pray tell what is this obnoxious looking... flower?”, Rose Questioned.

“Well my lovely Rose, it’s what I liked to call a “BLANK”, and its meaning stands for ever lasting love.” Kanaya gushed as she stated it like a fact well known by everyone.

“Oh, my apologies,” Rose teased, “it seems like the name of this flower slipped my mind, but I guess my question now is why is it by my work station.” Rose asked giving Kanaya a knowing look with a hint of mirth.

“Rose, my dear sweet, sweet Rose, playing coy I see.” Kanaya stated.

“Kanaya why I haven’t the foggiest idea what you could mean.” Rose said as matter of fact.

“Rose please, do you believe me to be so gullible with this little act of aloofness you are trying to play at.” Kanaya giggled with amusement at their little exchange.

“Oh for the love of GLUB, these two are too much sometimes!” Feferi hollered at the two lovers little back and forth ribbing.

“Fefuri I know you love seeing these two get into it with each other.” Nepeta said giving Feferi a side longed glance.

“Oh wow, they are still going at it I see!” Aradia popping up out of nowhere, covered in dirt and flower petals she usually accumulates from doing some deep weeding for the floral shop.

“AH!” Feferi shouted. “Would you stop glubbing doing that every time you pop up please!”

“What, I thought you liked me popping up surprisingly.” Aradia winked at Feferi as she gave her a response to the outburst.

“Yeah Fef, you always get so flushed and embarrassed when Aradia surprises you with gifts and other sultry things.” Nepeta said as she defended Aradia.

“Oh would you two stop glubbin gangin’ up on me like that.” Feferi pleaded in a high pitch voice.

“Ehehehehe, what Fef why are you so embarrassed about?” Aradia chuckled.

“Hmph!  Well y’all aren’t wrong so shush!” Feferi commanded.

“Oh you gonna have to make us glubbin’ shush with that cute mouth of yours if you wanna shush us!” Nepeta teased.

Rose and Kanya over hearing their little tirade of shouts glanced over amusingly and with as much smugness Rose could muster said “Whats this now about shushin mouths with said cute mouths?”

“Yes, please do tell us all about these shush sessions.” Kanaya chimed in with Rose going with the flow of teasing the group of girls.

“Oh wouldn’t you and Rose like to know all about these sessions, gettin’ any fresh ideas huh Rose?” Aradia said meeting Rose’s smugness with her own.

“Why yes please do tell!” Rose quipped back ready to verbally duke it out with Aradia.

Nepeta seeing what was about to go down interjected with, “Now girls please, no pawedy needs know about each other’s endeavors in broad daylight now.”

“YES! I would glubbin’ agree with dear sweet Nepeta here!” Feferi sidling up to Nepeta wrapping her arms around her from behind, burying her face in Nepeta’s beanie.

“Yes, while I am inclined to agree with “dear sweet Nepeta” as Feferi stated, what brings you two by our humble floral abode?” Kanaya questioned.

“Welp sea here, Dave and Karkat are going on about how the best way to vacuum the interior of cars would be more efficient if they attached multiple hoses together.” Feferi said.

Nepeta continuing from her girlfriends’ sentence, “And as luck would have it Sollux being the nerd that he is, explained to the both how, “only idiots can think of such a simple solution for bullshit problems” but only with more lisps.”

Feferi wincing at Nepeta’s explanation said, “Yeah he’s not always the most open to discussions when it seems too stupid and idiotic to him.” Feferi knowing full well what kind of debates Sollux likes to have since being his best friend since their childhood.

Rose looking over to Feferi with a look of amusement, “And I would assume my dope of a sibling along with their partner in bi crime proceeded to as they would state “the sickest of ill rebuttals you’d hear on the next hot record label ready to debunk and debate the livin’ shit out of this discussion”.” Rose doing her best impression of her sibling.

Catching on where Rose was going with her statement, Kanaya interjected with, “And Karkat being Karkat began to bombard the two with a mess of words which would ultimately lead to the three of them yelling at each other with anecdotes to the point they sent you two to find us three and as Karkat would say “get these two dipshits to understand how fuckin’ stupid they both sound”.” Kanaya also mimicking her dear friend of early childhood. “Which ultimately turned into a cesspool of jumbled words with at least hearing the word “FUCK” every other word said.”

Aradia pipping in with, “Which leads us three to diffuse their little bitchy argument and get to the bottom of the problem, being which, would be the most efficient way to vacuum people’s cars, right?” Aradia questioned at the end of their little but eventful discussion.

“YESH!” Both Nepeta and Feferi exclaimed excitingly.

Rose walking over to the two while holding Kanaya’s hand lovingly, “Well let’s not keep our dear audience waiting any longer then need be shall we.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there y'all! Second chapter just posted, and I'm kinda just going with the flow ya know? Anyways, as I go about this story, I'll add more tags and characters as they are introduced. And as far as which characters I'll include, they'll mostly be the ones I like and care about the most, so sorry if your fave character isn't in this story. As far as plot goes, its mostly going to be fluff with a bit of angst, which will be like Dave forgetting to roll someones sun window up while washing the car or Kanaya having some of her plants die due to poor management. So nothing too serious, but keep in mind I'm gonna try to make this as lovely gay as possible, cause ya know, it's what I want to write about. Anywho, thanks for the couple of kudos so far, I hope y'all will continue to like and read my story. Also any feedback as stated in the previous chapter would be greatly appreciated, keep it gay y'all!

Chapter 2

 

The five lovely ladies made their way across the small sidewalk that divided their work areas around a cozy cul-de-sac.  The shift of flowery perfume like smells to soapy with a hint of fresh pine tree smell was quite distinct, especially with the rowdy noise coming from their local car wash.

Rose peered over to the little group of noise makers and saw her sibling flapping their arms about, as they gave their other compatriots quite the rap off containing ill information.

“It seems my verbose sibling is giving the other two quite the rap session.” Rose stated, as her group overheard Dave’s sick ill rap sessions that were currently taking place.

“And another thing -Hey Rose- how else are we going to get between those tight ass cracks between the seats, tight like my ill fire beats!?” Dave quipped with ill verses not heard from this side of the cul-de-sac in ages.

“Listen asswipe -Hello Kanaya- the only tightness I’m concerned about is sealing those lips of yours.  Less I keep myself from running my head through the cleaning brushes set on the premium setting, to make sure the shit that I’m listening to gets washed the fuck out from my ears!” Karkat said after having taken a breath from his very verbose response to Dave’s ill raps, making sure to let y’all know they were in fact very ill.

“Oh my gog –Sup Fef- would you two imbeciles shut the fuck up about tight lips, the sexual tension from you two makes me want to purify my wretched soul through the hot deep cleaning steamer we offer those saps when their kids spill juice or their beastpets piss all over the seats!” Sollux said, followed by, “And don’t make me tape both yours and Dave’s mouths together with untearable duct tape.

“Nyeheheh, they are really going at it, huh?” Nepeta chortled at the smaller groups verbal battle of wits between each other.

Kanaya glancing at the three, smiled at their friendly and not so friendly display of affection. “Quite so, I’m surprised Karkat hasn’t resolved to beating down his heart-mate with a more eloquent approach, especially with more “fucks” thrown around!”

Chuckling at Kanaya’s comment, Aradia said, “Well at least it looks like Sollux hasn’t beaten them down with his vast logic and technical prowess of how vacuums suck, much less like he does at debating issues with other people and trolls.”

“HEY!” Sollux yelled, “Just because those two imbeciles have the brain of a day-old wiggler, doesn’t mean they can’t learn how to properly design a better crafted machine to suck as much as they do.”

“Hey, Sollux ease up on those insults, wouldn’t want to bite off your own tongue with those complex insults, now would you?” Nepeta berated Sollux with.

“That’s rich coming from a cat girl whose own tongue gets caught by a fish prep and ghost goth, isn’t it?” Sollux argued back.

“And glub does she love it!” Feferi chimed in adamantly.

“A bitch can get it!” Aradia gloated.

“Yes, a bitch can!” Rose agreed.

“Bitches aside, and one fine ass bitch mind you!” Kanaya interrupted with, “But why do you require our input if all three of you have come to a consensus of being both smart and “dumb as fuck” as Karkat would state, to come to an agreement on how to properly suck the shit out of car seats?” Kanaya questioned.

“Well not shit Kanaya!” Karkat yelled back, “But it would be nice to see if any of you flighty broads could come up with a better solution to this problem. Instead of this shit fest that the both of these idiots came up with!” Karkat explained.

“I don’t know Karkitty, I’d be very interested in Sollux’s suggestion of taping both you and Dave’s mouths together!” Nepeta stated while staring at the two with starry eyes.

“What’s this I hear about taping my bi tri packs mouths together without me included?” A random, but joyful voice interjected between all of them.

“OH GOG DAMNIT!!” Karkat yelled.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all, so it's been a few days since the last chapter, works been a drag ya know? Anyways here's the next chapter, and uhh I don't really have and idea of where this story is going. I'm just trying to have a bit of fun with this. Anyways any comments about this story would be grand, and also if the way I'm making these characters talk to one another seems off or wrong, let me know because I'm not the best at punctuation and proper wording. Having characters talk to one another and then describing how they talk to each other is a bit confusing for me, because I don't know if I'm doing it correctly, but besides that if y'all anything else that seems weird or off, please let me now. Cheers y'all!

Chapter 3

 

Barreling towards the now much bigger group, they could see Jade roller blading their way towards them.  Their ears, tail, and work skirt were flapping through the wind as they approached the group at high rollerblading speeds.  Then halting to a sudden stop in front of them, the group was greeted by a picture of a cute barkbeast printed on the front of Jade’s underwear as their skirt flared up from their sudden stop.

Rose seeing this, commented with a smirk, “Heh, that’s quite the cute pair of trousers you have their Jade!”

“I know right!? Cool boi Dave and rowdy boi Karkat gave me a few of these for our monthly bi-tri-pack appreciation weekend date!”

“Hell’s to the yeah!  Suave ass Jade and loud month Karkat got me some sick ass personally designed binders, decked out with Hella Jeff and Sweet Bro fanart!” Dave boasted.

“Hmph! Well both of these nook sniffers got me some knitted wooly sweaters designed with all of our signature pesterchum pictures, that are actually pretty fuckin nice!” Karkat stated adamantly.

“So anyways, what’s this I hear about tight lipping?” Jade asked.

“Well first off fur fuck face, the three of us,” Karkat waved around to himself, Dave, and Sollux, “were trying to figure out what would be the best way to vacuum between the cracks of sweet ass car seats.”

“Then we sent Nepeta and Fef here,” Dave chimed in, “to go get Rose the useless lesbian, Kanaya the lovely vampire lesbian, and the chaotic ghost lesbian enthusiast Aradia, and get their opinion on this dope ass problem.” Dave exclaimed.

“My my my, that’s some of the gayest descriptions I’ve heard “cool boi” Dave call us lesbians in quite a while.” Kanaya giggled in between the other group’s explanation.

“Yeah, cause these two brain-dead idiots couldn’t come with anything better than stickin’ more hoses on the damn vacuums.”  Sollux complained.

“Listen you blue-eyed red-eyed bitch-” Karkat began to yell but was interrupted by Jade.

“Now Karkat that’s not nice to say, why not call him a two-toned eyed bitch? It’s much wittier, wouldn’t you agree Rose?” Jade asked.

“Quite so Jade! I might even call him a tie-dye eyed kind of bitch!” Rose commented back with.

Sollux looking at all of them with a bewildered expression yelled, “Wow holy shit! What is this, roast Sollux hour?”

“Yeah, you guys stop being so glubbin’ mean to my bi-eye-colored bitch of a friend!” Feferi argued as she defended her bbff’s honor.

“Fef, seriously?” Sollux asked befuddled.

“That’s tough love for ya, ya primary eye colored son of a bitch!” Aradia yelled.

“Whatever, y’all are fucking assholes!” Sollux said stubbornly.

“Not that I’m having a pawsitively fun time ribbing on Sollux, but did any of you asswipes actually come up with a solution?” Nepeta asked.

“Or are y’all just bullshitin’ around, till us lesbians showed up?” Kanaya finishing Nepeta’s other question.

“Well tbh, uhh we really kinda just forgot about that. We could care less about this shit.” Karkat said, “Honestly, we were just killin’ time until y’all showed up, this place is blowing chunks right now.”

Dave taken off their sunglasses to clean them, continued with “And now that you gaggle of lesbos have showed up, we wanted to see if y’all wanted to have a bonfire down by the beach tomorrow since we all luckily have the next couple of days off?”

“OH GLUB!” Feferi jumped with gayly lesbian glee, “My guardian has a summer house down there, we can all camp out and have a glubbin’ party!”

“Oh, a party sounds grand!” Kanaya cheered.

Dave putting their sunglasses back on, asked “I’m so down for this bitchin’ party, me asks this; what kind of party are we gonna be havin’?”

Aradia smirked, “It’s pretty obv what kind of party we are gonna have, ain’t that right Neps?”

Nepeta knowing where Aradia was going with her comment, smirked back with “Oh ny’all know what kinda party we are going to have! I only ask people bring their own stash, so we aren’t stuck with one type of catnip, if ny’all catch my drift!”

“OH, HO OH!” Rose seemed pleased with where this drift was now in fact going, “I see we are in for quite the grand lesbo high of time this weekend!”

Jade also excited about where this drift was going asked, “OH YES! FUCK YES! Wait…is there such a thing of barkbeastnip?”

Nepeta faking a hurt expression, “How could you ask me such an obvious question, knowing damn well such a strain of nip exists.  What kind of lesbian cat girl do you take me for?”

“Hmm, I see the errors of my ways. How could I ever ask a benign question?” Jade bowed at and continued with, “Now the next question will be can you bring me some of that bitchin’ nip with you for me and my bi-tri-pack plzzzzzzz!?”

“You fuckin’ know it!” Nepeta cheered as she glomped Jade.

“Hey now cool cat, enough of that for now. Save all that energy for tomorrow, as it will also go to waste after we light it up, like Dave’s sick fire beats!” Aradia said as she jumped up and down, clapping her hands in excitement.

“Oh, you know it, such sick ass fire beats!” Dave stated smoothly, like their sick fire beats.

“Well while you nerds get those fire beats situated, I’m gonna head on back to the restaurant with Rose to ask if the others wanna join in.” Jade said.

“Indeed, now Fef, we’ll talk later and hash out more of the sweet deets later.” Rose said towards Feferi. “Also, my darling Kanaya, why don’t you head over back to our lil’ humble abode with Aradia and get some of our special “flowers” ready. Please if you would!” Rose asked Kanaya and continued with, “And try not to miss me too much, for the time we shall be apart will seem like an eternity until I’m back in your gracious and loving arms!” Rose fawned at, over Kanaya.

“Rose, please! And eternity is too short of a time span that can properly express how long we’ll be apart from each other.” Kanaya said back with remorse.

“Alright, alright, alright, enough with this ill-gotten love fest!” Karkat exclaimed. “Just get y’alls sorry asses back to from whence you came, so we can end this day sooner and get this party going for tomorrow.”

“Karkles is right, we’ll get everything ready for tomorrow!” Dave chimed in with. “We’ll message y’all later when we decide how this shindig of dig-down will go down!”

Jade snickering at Dave’s comment, “HELLS YEAH! See y’all bitches later, c’mon Rose!”

“I bid you adieu my dear sweet Kanaya!” Rose lovingly stated towards Kanaya, as she walked away with Jade.

Kanaya sighing as her matesprit walked away, “And I you my lovely Rose!”

“Glubbin’ gog, those two are so in love with each other, I’m starting to get flushed with all their love gushing about!” Feferi said as she started fanning herself.

“Heh, what a lovely ship made from up above and so below.” Nepeta stated poetically. “So Fef, want to head back to the flower shop with Aradia and I so we can “discuss” more about our plans for tomorrow?”

“Only if we our “discussion” is in a place where my hair won’t get riddled with compost and smell like horse shit afterwards.” Feferi lamented.

“I believe that can be arranged!” Aradia stated eagerly.

“I would appreciate it if y’all would keep it down when we get back. I have to go over some of our inventory and I don’t want to get distracted with all this sweet ass “discussion” that’s going to be taking place when we get back!” Kanaya warned them.

“FUCK YESH!” Nepeta also agreed.

With that, the three gills plus Kanaya, as Feferi would say, went back to the flower shop, to have some sweet, sweet, sweet ass “discussions” amongst themselves. And hopefully not get Kanaya too flustered until her Rose would come back and save her from such “discussions”.


End file.
